How to have sex that keeps getting better | Emily Jamea | TEDxThird Ward
What makes for an incredible sexual experience? Is it advanced technique or the ability to contort your body into a pretzel? Is it the rush of the honeymoon phase? No... and no. So what is it? One day, as a client described the kind of sex they longed for – sex that made the world around them disappear – I realized they were describing something familiar: a flow state. You know the feeling. A surfer who becomes one with the wave. A musician lost in the music. These are experiences that yield a sense of timelessness, total absorption, and merger. But no one was talking about this in the context of sex. So, being an evidence-based practitioner, I turned to the research and found… nothing. No studies. No theory. No guidebook. So, I conducted my own first-of-its-kind study exploring the link between flow and sexual satisfaction. What I found blew me away: couples who experienced flow reported deeper intimacy, higher desire, and more satisfying sex far beyond what those described in the honeymoon phase. The quantitative data was a huge win, but it was through hours of interviews, that I discovered the five essential elements that helped couples reliably reach this state, shifting not only how I work as a therapist, but also how I live my own life. This talk is the story of that discovery and how it might just change everything you thought you knew about desire, connection, and the kind of sex that keeps getting better.Dr. Emily Jamea is an award-winning sex and relationship therapist and the USA Today best-selling author of Anatomy of Desire: Five Secrets to Create Connection and Cultivate Passion.
Emily is a sought-after keynote speaker who presents nationally and internationally to diverse audiences, including educators, health and mental health professionals, corporate leaders, and the general public. Her expertise has been featured in Oprah Magazine, CNN, USA Today, NBC, and more. She offers online workshops as part of her mission to make her knowledge accessible to everyone. Dr. Jamea is a multi-award-winning columnist for Healthy Women and was named as a 2025 Outstanding Woman in Medicine by The Arts of Healing Foundation. In her free time, Emily enjoys spending time with her husband and children, traveling as much as possible, and salsa dancing and painting when she gets the chance.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx Receive SMS online on sms24.me
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